Have you ever felt like you have gotten a second chance?? At anything?? I feel like I have gotten the chance of a lifetime to stay up here in da Berg! :) I freaking love it up here! I also have missed home the most I have ever have in my life. I think this semester has been a really great one for me. I seriously have learned so very much from myself and the people around me... :D It makes me so happy that I could experience last semester to really appreciate this semester as much as I have! I even had the experience of my first kiss this semester! :) I will claim it too! It was a relationship that I learned a lot. His name was Tyler and he was and is a really great guy. He didn't really seem to me as a guy that was "that guy" for me, but pretty close... And, to be honest, I learned a lot from him. He was a gentleman. He opened my doors, he walked on the outside of the street for me, which I had never seen that before, he would offer me his jacket, he would cuddle me so I was warm, he would make sure that I was warm and comfortable. He would call me on the phone and hardly text me. He was SUCH a great guy and he just liked me for me. Things between us didn't work out, but I saw it coming.
I have found when I stay close to the spirit, I can really understand things. The Lord gives me opportunity to perceive His will in all things, and just to discern, to see far enough in the future to know the result of my decisions, and he guides me through those decisions, righteously! He is always there, has always been there. Life, I have found, has been so much better since I have discovered these things. Following promptings and listening to the spirit, is the most amazing thing that you can do. You see with different eyes an you also can be the person you have always wanted to be. I have always had this passion for learning, seeking understanding and wisdom. I have been having such a hard time finding the thing that I want to put my education towards. I have thought of Art, Music, History, English, Political Science, Family Studies, Psychology, Sociology. There are so many things that interest me, and honestly, I feel like I could do well at any of them. I guess all I can really do, is continue to learn about myself and find those things that are TRULY important to me and find opportunities to serve and love the people around me and in my community!
I have met sooooooo many people that I can see myself being friends with forever. My roommates this semester have been AMAZING! First off, my roommate, roommate, Megan Sherwood. I just love her! She has surely made a big difference in my life! Last semester, when I was extremely lonely and would just run to get my mind off of everything, she started coming with me and it meant the world to me, even though she didn't even really know it. We would talk about things and I could just sit and talk to her and she would listen and give input. That is one thing I need in a relationship, a conversational person. I don't like always talking. I love listening and pondering on how I can help, then I take what they say and learn from it myself. I have decided that is why my relationships don't last long. Even though it is always the boys that initiate the friend zone, I know that it will be hard, but, in all honesty, I know its the Lord's will for me. I am okay with it. Sure, its difficult because to going from someone holding you, kissing you, holding your hand, hanging on your every last word, to..... nothing. But honestly, something I had to realize, is the Lord is there. Our Savior is there. They know where we fit in their grand design. We voluntarily came to this earth, knowingly of what we were going to go through and who we were going to be with. And if we play our cards right, we can be close to our Father in Heaven and He can help us know what direction we need to go to find those people! We just have to be willing to listen.
My other roommates I just love to pieces! :) There is Haley O'brien, she was here last semester and roomed with Mckenzie! She is really great and we have became really great friends! :) Seriously. These last few days when I feel lonely or sad, she knows just how to cheer me up and get me back in my happy and upbeat mood. Her and Tessa. Tessa Wade, I swear, is a sister sent from above! I don't know why I haven't known her for all of my life. Perhaps I wasn't ready for her. She is AMAZING! I seriously could see me and her growing old together as neighbors until our death beds. She just gets me. And we love pretty much the same things and she just speaks Tauni language, which is hard to do. I just love her. I want to be JUST like her when I grow up :) We have shared so much already.... and honestly, she is one reason I am scared to go on a mission. Scared we will loose this great friendship and she will forget about me :( That is one of my greatest fears of going on a mission. That all these people will just forget about me for a couple years and then be back to a casual friendships when I get back. I dunno. I'm weird, perhaps. And then there is my Megans. First, Megan Stout. WOW! Me and her were destined to be friends :) SHe is sooooo great and I can't even describe! She is this super fun and outgoing girl that is another eternal friend I hope to keep! :) And Megan Clifford! hehe! She is one of thee girliest girls I have ever met, but I just LOVE her! :) She is this sweet spirited and nurturing girl! :) I just want to be friends with her forever :) She makes me happy :) But, I don't think she thinks as much as herself as we all see her, but that is one of my missions, to help EVERY SINGLE GIRL in these two apartments feel better about themselves. Of course, there is only so much I can do, but honestly I think that people don't show appreciation and praise to women as much as they should. I hope to remind people of who they truly are and that they are beautiful and handsome people. :)
Then there is Kayla, Rachel, and Lindsey. The girls of my past! :) Hehehe! I just love them! They make my world so much better! They are amazing young ladies that I admire sooooo much! :)
I just feel like I have gotten the best of bestest chances to really find myself. :) I just love it so much! :) I can't wait to get out there and serve. I am almost done with my mission papers and I am SO STOAKED! :) That and I have started religiously writing a few missionaries that are just super great! :) I just love to learn and being able to serve! :)
I hope you all have a great night! remember who you are and that you are loved! :) :)
<3 Tauni Ackerman
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